


come and look inside of me

by adamantine



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Daemon Touching, M/M, Nightmares, Post Azure Moon Route
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 14:40:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30057009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adamantine/pseuds/adamantine
Summary: Dimitri wakes up from a nightmare and has a talk, among other things, with Felix.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 12
Kudos: 41





	come and look inside of me

**Author's Note:**

> this is a dæmon AU \o/ i don't really explain what dæmons are but if you don't know they're from _his dark materials_ and in the vaguest sense they're a person's soul in the form of an animal. a child's dæmon can change between different animals but an adult's dæmon "settles" and stays in one form forever.

The fire burns brightly, illuminating the dead. His father’s head is brightest of all, his golden hair shining from the flames.

“Your Highness!”

Glenn yanks him away from the mountain of corpses. Dimitri stumbles over something and almost falls. When he looks at the ground he sees a severed arm.

“Glenn!” Drudwen—Glenn’s dæmon—flies above them, her dark wings blending into the night sky. “We’re about to have company!”

Aneira transforms into a white dove but as it isn’t a form she favors she flies much closer to Dimitri than Drudwen does to Glenn.

Glenn stands at the ready with his sword and shield. “Your Highness—“ A burst of flames engulfs him.

Drudwen screams and dives down; Dimitri assumes she’s trying to reach Glenn to be with him in their last moments, but instead she uses the last of her energy to throw herself against Aneira, pushing her out of harm’s way as a volley of arrows flies past them.

“Run!” Drudwen shouts and dissolves into nothingness.

Dimitri obeys. He runs through the flames, runs through the corpses of his friends and family, runs through rivers of blood—

He runs and runs and runs and—

Dimitri snaps a rebel’s neck. Skewers another on his lance. Four men charge him. He throws them, hears the crunch of their bones when they hit a wall.

It’s the first time in his life that he’s using his full strength in a fight and it’s _thrilling_.

A few of the rebels get clever and target Aneira but despite her enormous size she’s frightening in her speed; she tears apart their dæmons before they can touch her.

Dimitri smiles, licks the blood from his lips—

“Dimitri?” Felix looks at him with wide, frightened eyes. Beside him, Tarian curves her spine and hisses.

_I can explain,_ Dimitri tries to say but the words get caught in his throat.

Felix is right. He’s nothing more than a beast craving blood.

Dimitri turns away in shame.

A pile of rubble collects in front of the cathedral’s altar. Aneira sits to the right of him covering his blindspot, a patch of sunlight illuminating her golden fur.

From the corner of his eye, Dimitri sees Tarian slinking past him to confront Aneira. Felix calls after her, demanding that she return to him, but she ignores him. She’s never been good at listening to Felix. When they were children he used to beg her to settle as a wolf.

She settled as a cat.

(Aneira settled as a Northern Faerghus mastiff the night before the Western Rebellion; the memory is a bitter one for Dimitri even if he doesn’t resent her form.)

Dimitri turns his body just enough to watch Tarian approaching Aneira. Like all dæmons, Tarian and Aneira are larger than the animals they mimic. Tarian looks quite intimidating next to a real cat; Dimitri has seen her bullying the monastery cats when Felix pays them too much attention and even the largest of them are still smaller than her. But next to Aneira, she might as well be the size of a kitten. Their size disparity is almost laughable.

Dimitri doesn’t laugh. Neither does Aneira. She eyes Tarian warily. She knows better than to underestimate Tarian’s fighting prowess. Quick, clever, and vicious: Tarian is a blur of teeth and claws on the battlefield. She leaves nothing to chance and kills with an efficiency Aneira doesn’t bother with. He doesn’t know which of them would win in a fight.

But Tarian hasn’t come to fight. Quite the opposite. She rubs herself against Aneira’s legs affectionately; Dimitri feels the echoes of her touch through his bond with Aneira.

“Will you make Tarian die for you too?” Drudwen’s ghost asks Aneira cruelly.

Aneira growls.

Tarian leaps back with a hiss. Aneira’s disappointment reverberates through their bond.

“No.” Dimitri shakes his head. “No.”

“When will you kill the Emperor?” Glenn asks.

“Soon,” Dimitri promises.

“Soon—always soon.” Glenn spits. Drudwen flies to him and lands on his shoulders. “Every day that she lives more innocent lives are lost. Their blood is on _your_ hands!”

“I know, but I can’t—“

“USELESS!” Glenn screams. Drudwen spreads her wings. “YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED THAT DAY, NOT US!”

Fire fills the cathedral. Glenn and Drudwen melt in the heat like they’re made of wax.

“Dimitri?”

Dimitri turns; Felix and Tarian are melting too.

“This is your fault,” Felix says with what’s left of his mouth.

“Help us,” says Tarian as she lifts a paw toward Aneira.

“No!” Dimitri screams. _Not them! Not them!_

Dimitri wakes with a start, his heart pounding furiously.

A nightmare. Not reality.

Aneira whines quietly from the other side of the bed. He feels a tinge of hurt when she doesn’t come to comfort him until he notices Tarian is curled up on his chest, fast asleep and purring, which means Felix isn’t awake either.

Dimitri lets out a huff of amusement. Of course Aneira would choose cuddling with Felix over comforting him—typical. She always abandons Dimitri when Felix spends the night, something that has been increasing as of late.

Felix stretches in his sleep and accidentally brushes Aneira’s fur, making Dimitri shiver. Touching another person’s dæmon is either the greatest of violations or the deepest of intimacies; when it’s Felix touching Aneira, it’s firmly the latter.

“What time is it?” Dimitri asks quietly.

“Seven maybe,” Aneira whispers. “It’s hard to tell with the curtains drawn so tight.”

Dimitri hums in acknowledgment and stares up at the canopy of his bed. Drudwen and Eirianwen circle him like vultures. Rodrigue’s ghost never haunts him but sometimes Eirianwen—his dæmon—does.

“It was a nightmare, nothing more,” Aneira says.

Drudwen and Eirianwen vanish.

“I know,” Dimitri says.

“Do you?” Aneira asks.

Before Dimitri can answer her, Tarian’s claws sink into his skin. Her willingness to touch him is a recent development. Sometimes, it makes him profoundly happy.

Other times—

“Felix,” Dimitri whines as Tarian makes mincemeat of his chest.

Felix grunts out something unintelligible.

“Felix— _Tarian, please._ ”

Tarian’s claws continue to assault him even as she stands up and arches her back.

Certainly, Dimitri could remove her if he _really_ wanted to, but that would mean touching her. He knows Felix wouldn’t mind it but—

“Tarian, stop bullying Dimitri,” Felix grumbles as he turns onto his back.

“He’s being mopey,” Tarian accuses. She jumps from Dimitri’s chest to his pillow; there she begins to rub her face on his. The contact is startling; he imagines it must be doubly so for Felix.

“I had a nightmare,” Dimitri admits.

Tarian licks his forehead with her rough tongue.

Felix rolls over and settles on top of Dimitri, much as Tarian did. He stares down at Dimitri, concern marring his features.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Dimitri says. “It’s not important.”

Tarian walks away, briefly nuzzling Felix’s arm as she passes him, and climbs onto Aneira. Unlike Dimitri, Aneira welcomes the pinpricks of Tarian’s claws. Her tongue lolls in excitement and when Tarian drops in front of her she licks Tarian’s entire back in greeting. Tarian yowls in shock but Aneira is ever-smitten and pulls her close with a massive paw.

Felix snorts in amusement; Dimitri takes it as permission to pull Felix close to him as well.

Felix yelps. “Boar! Let go of me!”

Dimitri chuckles and kisses the top of his head. “No, I don’t think I will.”

Felix wriggles in his arms, trying hopelessly to escape. Aneira and Tarian jump off the bed and settle somewhere out of sight. Dimitri feels the echoes of Aneira’s joy when Tarian does something to her—grooms her, Dimitri guesses.

Felix bites his chest.

Dimitri startles. “Really?”

“Let go of me you beast.”

“No,” Dimitri says and flips them over. He cages Felix in with his arms but he doesn’t hold him down; Felix can get away if he wants to.

He doesn’t want to.

He glares up at Dimitri, his face flushed and his long hair fanning around him like a dark halo.

“Move into my quarters,” Dimitri says abruptly. “Or—if you wish to keep a separate space—you can have the queen’s wing.”

“We’re not married,” Felix points out.

“So?”

“People will talk.”

“People _already_ talk.”

Felix’s flush deepens. He likes to pretend no one knows about their relationship. As if there’s anything discreet about how often he warms Dimitri’s bed.

“If you could just control your dæmon—“

“Excuse me? Tarian is the one that goes around showing off how much Aneira loves her. That’s on _you._ ” He jabs Felix in the chest.

“Yes, well. At Aneira listens to you. If I tell Tarian to do something, she’ll do the opposite of it to spite me.”

“It wasn’t _Tarian_ that pet Aneira like a common dog during a council session.”

“Stop reminding me.” Felix covers his face.

“I’ve never seen that many people faint at the same time before.” Felix fled to Fraldarius for two moons after the incident. The moment he returned Aneira picked up Tarian by the scruff of her neck and refused to put her down until Felix promised not to run away again.

“Shut up,” Felix begs.

“You practically live here already when you’re in not in Fraldarius.” Dimitri knows he must sound like a spoiled child, but he can’t help it. He wants Felix to himself, no matter how selfish of a desire it may be.

Felix uncovers his face. “I don’t want to live in the queen’s wing.”

Dimitri nods. “I understand.” He bites back his disappointment.

Felix flicks his forehead. “Let me finish. Using the queen’s wing isn’t much of an improvement in distance. I’d rather move my things into your rooms. For the sake of convenience.”

Dimitri breaks out into a wide, toothy grin. “Of course.” He bows his head and kisses Felix. “For the sake of convenience.”

“That’s what I said.” Felix snakes his arms around Dimitri’s neck and pulls him close.

Their lips meet again and again; both of them greedy for each other. Dimitri kisses along Felix’s jaw. Sucks on his neck and collar. Bites on his already marked skin.

Dimitri pushes up Felix’s shirt, itching to rip it off entirely but he doesn’t feel like suffering through Felix’s wrath.

“I’m not your wife,” Felix says suddenly.

“I know?”

Felix sits up long enough to peel off his shirt. “Do you?”

“I would remember if we were married.”

Felix pulls Dimitri’s hair; it’s not the punishment he thinks it is. “Don’t get clever with me.”

Dimitri drags his knee between Felix’s legs, pressing at his bulge. Felix’s angry little expression turns dazed.

“Wife, husband, partner, consort—pick a title Felix, and it’s yours.”

“Fool,” Felix gasps as he grinds shamelessly against Dimitri’s thigh.

Dimitri smirks.

Some time later, Dimitri opens the balcony doors and ties back the curtains, airing out the room and flooding it with sunlight.

Tarian leaps onto the bed and whispers something into Felix’s ear. Felix’s eyes widen; he whispers a reply to her. She scratches him viciously and the two of them start up an inaudible argument. Dimitri wonders if he should intervene, but Aneira nudges him with her snout and he leaves them be.

“We have a meeting with the Morfis ambassador today,” Aneira says.

Dimitri makes a face. “I forgot.” Though he supposes Aneira remembering means he didn’t _really_ forget—they’re one and the same, after all.

“Boar, come here,” Felix calls out.

He yelps. Dimitri guesses Tarian scratched him again. “ _Dimitri_ , I mean.”

Dimitri turns from the window and finds Felix rubbing at his arm, Tarian sitting next to him without a trace of guilt.

“I don’t want you to take a wife,” Felix announces moodily.

Somehow, Tarian manages to make a pinched expression; it’s an impressive feat on a cat. “Must you word it so stupidly?” she asks Felix.

“Shut up,” Felix snaps.

Just as Dimitri and Aneira are one person, so are Felix and Tarian. It doesn’t matter how much Felix grumbles that Tarian doesn’t listen to him—Tarian _is_ him. Everything she does comes from him. She’s his _soul_. Their fights only happen because Felix struggles to be honest with himself.

Dimitri sits on the edge of the bed and watches Felix carefully. Aneira lies down at his feet, her presence a steady comfort.

“I can’t be expected to take a wife if I already have one,” Dimitri says mischievously.

Felix’s eyes twitch in anger. He breathes in slowly and deeply, trying his best to calm his anger.

It doesn’t work.

“I’m not your wife!” He throws a pillow at Dimitri’s head.

Dimitri unintentionally ducks it as he collapses on top of the bed in a fit of laughter

“Goodness, you’re too easy to tease.” He has no idea why Felix reacts so violently to being called his wife; it’s not as if anyone would ever think of doing so, even if they were married. There’s not a wifely bone in Felix’s body.

“What I meant is naturally if I’m already married I can’t be expected to marry again. So if you don’t want me to take a wife…” He trails off hopefully.

Felix crosses his arms. “Hmph.”

As usual, Tarian is Felix’s walking contradiction. She comes and sits in front of Dimitri.

He reaches out and pets her.

Felix relaxes instantly, his eyes glazing over. Tarian preens; Dimitri can feel her delight, her pleasure, her love—

No. That isn’t it. It’s _Felix’s_ delight, _Felix’s_ pleasure, _Felix’s_ love that he feels. Felix’s soul is bursting with happiness.

Not to be left out, Aneira jumps onto Felix’s side of the bed. She’s heavy enough that when she lands she briefly jolts Felix out of his stupor; he sinks his hand into her fur and Dimitri forgets how to breathe. It feels as if Felix has reached inside of him and wrapped his hand around Dimitri’s heart. It should be terrifying but it’s not—it’s the most wonderful, amazing feeling Dimitri can imagine. His heart, his soul is in Felix’s hands, just as it should be.

Dimitri cries out from the overwhelming pleasure of being _known_ by Felix. There’s no need for words between them; Felix feels everything he wants to say. Dimitri’s thoughts spin, yet his mind feels hazy and slow.

_Felix, Felix, Felix—_

His entire world narrows to Felix consuming his soul.

Dimitri spills onto the sheets; any shame he might feel is impossible to conjure up. How can he when Felix floods his soul with approval?

He realizes with a frightened start that he’s still holding onto Tarian. He lets go of her abruptly, worrying that he might have hurt her when he was lost in his haze, but she shows no signs of injury.

She isn’t as fragile as she appears.

Felix strokes Aneira’s fur a final time; she’s gone as stupidly slack as Dimitri. Tarian rubs her entire body against her, purring so loudly Dimitri can feel the vibrations from where he lies.

“You would truly marry me?” Felix asks even though he already knows the answer; he could feel it when he held Dimitri’s soul.

“Yes.”

“All right then. I suppose all those fools in court will just have to get over themselves.”

“Indeed.” Dimitri slides closer to him, kissing his way up Felix’s arm, from his palm to shoulder, until Felix grabs his chin and tilts it up so they can share a proper kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> i was imagining a very big lion-looking dog dæmon for dimitri because if he had an _actual_ lion dæmon she would be female and therefore maneless and i think dimitri's dæmon should be fluffy :(((((
> 
> ALSO i gave all the dæmons welsh names because i'm not creative enough to invent a word like "fraldarius" & welsh names already figure prominently in faerghus. i'm telling you this because the world needs to know "tarian" is a real welsh name and it means _shield_.


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